Thursday, December 6, 2012

Quick Christmas Rant

A couple of years ago we were gifted an Elf on a Shelf by my brother and sister-in-law. I don't like him at all. (Meaning the elf, not my brother, I like him.) You can read a little more about the elf gift HERE. One of these days I'm going to gift them the same gift back, but I'll wait until they have a few more kids, and have to be a little "more careful" with such magical Christmas powers.

My understanding of the Elf, whom my children affectionately named Jingle Wingle, is that he is here as a spy of sorts, for Santa. He watches the children's behavior and reports back to Santa every so often. Jingle moves around the house hiding in places where he can observe the children most effectively.

I dislike Jingle for several reasons:

1. It really doesn't magically improve my children's behavior. Although the 3 year old does look at it and stare if his behavior is being questionable, and somebody says, "Jingle Wingle can see you." Besides, shouldn't my children WANT to behave 365 days of the year, not just the days leading up to Christmas.

2. Sometimes it seems we have a lazy elf. He forgets to move. The children will wake up and find him in the same spot as the night before. I explain it as perhaps Jingle found it an extra good spot to observe behavior from and chose to stay there a day or two (or three). Then I get irritated that I'm making excuses for an elf I don't even like.

3. All over Facebook I see photos posted of other peoples elves into all sorts of mischief. One in a pile of salt making snow angels, one in a bag of dumped over marshmallows, etc. I thought the elf was supposed to be coming to watch for good behavior, not participate in poor behavior?

All these Facebook photos are accompanied by expressions of glee and excitement of children finding their elf in such amusing situations.

Not us. He is always boring, doing pretty much exactly what the title of his accompanying book is titled, The Elf on a Shelf.

I have enough messes to clean up without having to clean up after a silly elf. And besides, I need to keep him up high out of the reach of little hands, or he'll end up being frantically searched for in toy cupboards and bedrooms. And if I get irritated that I have to make excuses for the silly thing, I certainly don't want to be searching for him.

That's the children's job each morning to find Jingle Wingle's new hiding spot. Except it usually only takes them 10 seconds or less to find him, as he isn't exactly the most creative elf around

Rant now ends.

Merry Christmas.


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