A Successful Vacation

We don't take a lot of FAMILY vacations or trips.  It just doesn't really seem to jive for our family. I would love to say it was different, but we make individual and partial trips work in the best way we can for OUR family. With that said, it was sort of out of the ordinary recently to embark on a family trip last week and even more out of the ordinary to say, we actually all enjoyed it!

Except for the part that we experienced a NINE HOUR flight delay. There was a lot of laying around the airport. Literally.

(We received vouchers from the airline for our delay, and before we'd even taken off I was planning the next vacation. Mike recommended we get through this one first.)

Last week we visited beautiful Southern California for a Sowby Family Reunion. It's the branch of the family that two previous family reunions are recorded HERE and HERE.

These Sowby Reunions where the descendants of George Isaac and Annie Martine gather, have happened every two years for 35+ years.

                                              

For many years now, and especially the last couple reunions, fewer and fewer descendants are making the reunion a priority. It makes me sad, and honestly, a little bitter. Everyone is busy, everyone has schedules and everyone has conflicts.We do/did too. In fact, for some reason we had a lot of hiccups, setbacks and difficulties making this reunion happen for our family. The seven hour flight delay at the airport seemed to be the cherry on top, but then some complications (and a 1.5 hour wait) at the car rental place at LAX topped the cherry and caused me to look at Mike, and while trying so hard not to cry questioned, "Maybe we seriously are not meant to be here?"

But we were
.
We made it happen.
A few other families did too, and the result was a glorious time spent together laughing, crying, playing and enjoying family bonds.

Megan Sowby, Luke Sowby, Hannah Flaherty, Joshua Sowby, Connor Flaherty

Ryan Flaherty, Ellie Sowby, Sarah Flaherty, Drew Sowby

 Joshua, Sarah and Ryan Flaherty, Drew 

 front to back: Carol & Bernard Baker, George & Christene Sowby, Sandy Mittleman, Karena Hamilton

 Tiffany, Karena Hamilton, Bernard Baker, Jennifer Flaherty, Steve Mittleman, Damon Flaherty

Seth Hamilton, Mike, Carol Baker, Karen Mittleman, George Sowby, Christene Sowby, Amber Larson

Sowby Children, Hamilton Children, Flaherty Children, Larson Children

Obviously, I have never met Annie Martine Sowby. I'm related to her only through marriage, but over the past several years, I've had a handful of very personal experiences that have caused me to believe Annie Martine is one of my personal cheerleaders. A week or so before we left for the reunion, Mike and I were seriously debating whether or not to cancel our plans to go. One morning, I woke up early and knew I couldn't cancel. In a text exchange to Mike, I told him, "We're going to CA! I'm going for Annie Martine." (It's funny--I never refer to her as simply, Annie or Great-Grandma Annie, she is Annie Martine.)

How could seeing these scenes, not make Annie Martine (and of course George Isaac and their children whose posterity is represented here) rejoice and smile down from Heaven?

Cousins Carol Baker, Karen Mittleman and George Sowby

 According to Joshua (and this photo proof), Joshua did all the work maneuvering the kayak.

Luke and Sarah (Flaherty) were so proud of this creation they built on Mike's tomb. It was just moments away from completion when a HUGE wave wiped out everything you see in the above picture.

 Mike, Luke and Megan (photo courtesy of Cousin Sandy Mittleman)

 (photo courtesy of Cousin Sandy Mittleman)

 (photo courtesy of Cousin Sandy Mittleman)

(photo courtesy of Cousin Sandy Mittleman)

These relationships don't just happen at one reunion-- they happen over time. Mike and I have been blessed to have these people in our lives on a regular basis. With the exception of a few of the older cousins, my children knew these cousins. They mentioned everyone before we even got there. They knew who to expect, who they would enjoy playing with the most, and who they wanted to see first. We've not only made these reunions a priority, but we've opened our home to most of these people on many occasions over the years. It makes me smile that our relationships with most of them run much deeper than simply seeing each other every couple of years at a reunion.

Like this girl for example.
LOVE HER.

Cousin Jennifer is one of my favorite friends! Our husbands laugh about just how much we have in common, so it was no surprise that we also have the same make-up bags. Jennifer and I talk to each other a few times a month. Usually because one of us needs talking down from a ledge, or one of us needs reminding that we really do love our children. Love this cousin of Mike's! We likely should have been sisters, but then I couldn't have married Mike. So we'll suffice as cousins and friends.

I shouldn't have favorites, but I admit I do! Cousin Karena and Cousin Sandy (no photo of  us!!!!!) are two of my other favorites. I wish I had spent more time just sitting and visiting with them, but it didn't quite work out that way. But, that's nothing that a future trip to Utah won't be able to solve.

One afternoon, Karena, Jennifer and I left the children in the care of husbands and cousins at the pool and snuck up to my room for some left-over chocolate cake.

Not sure how well Mike was keeping an eye on the children...

This sand bucket cost $1.00 at the dollar store. Joshua couldn't bear the thought of us leaving it there on the beach for another child to play with. When he realized, "They really will let me take this on the plane? Then I'm taking it." It was a done deal. He carried that bucket around with him for the next several hours.

Joshua and Megan opted for a kayak ride with Mike. Drew, Luke and Ellie opted for a trampoline jump:

 The headaches of getting to California have almost been forgotten. Our memories made at yet another reunion, are deposits into relationship banks that we will withdraw from throughout the rest of our lives. Unfortunately for my little family, it seems we are all too familiar with family members who don't seem to make relationships a priority-we know who loves us and want to be around us, and we focus on those people. The others, I guess, are just missing out!

 Newport Beach LDS Temple

Attempting to capture a photo of these 5 clowns at the beach was a joke.

Balboa Pier, CA

After finally arriving in Los Angeles after our 9 hour flight delay and then experiencing further complications at the car rental place, I sent some serious vibes heavenward to Annie Martine to start intervening on our behalf. I like to think she did.

With the exception of the day Drew exhausted us all with his incessant requests for a wooden surf board souvenir for his stuffed animal, Monkey, and forgetting a few minor moments of quarreling and exhaustion, it was a successful family vacation.

 So now, where to use our travel vouchers to visit next?!

The Things We Do

So, I think I sort of shot myself in the foot...
Especially considering just this morning, feeling as though I deserved a break I laid on the couch and let my children eat cold cereal for breakfast asking myself, "Do I do too much for my children?" (After I had already packed 5 lunches, fixed oatmeal for a child that then decided they didn't want it, and had already fixed breakfast for a child that left before the others...) Typically, after arriving home from the gym around 6:20, I'm straight into wake-up children, fix breakfast, pack lunches, get out the door mode. This morning, I went on a temporary strike.

Let's back-up to give just a little background from a couple of different perspectives...

Point one: I came home from my early morning shift working at the temple on Saturday, to find Mike organizing our big pantry. It was a pleasant, much needed surprise, yet I couldn't help feel like a little ashamed when he mentioned a long list of things we are out of, and presented a handful of expired cans of food. (I typically pride myself on not having expired food.) Now before you start thinking of faulting me for feeling shame--it wasn't like you think--it's just, well, we eat so many fresh food, fruits and vegetables, that simply keeping a fridge and pantry full for 7 people for immediate consumption, sort of makes one forget the longer term storage that's wise to keep.

Point two: Mike has been requesting that we eat more rice. I've never been a huge rice fan myself, but he likes it, and I keep meaning to incorporate more rice into our meals.

Point three: I've been sort of low on rice lately, and yesterday while at Costco, decided to stock up on rice to help out with aforementioned points one and two.

On another note,

Point one: Though we have both an upstairs and downstairs furnace, due to the layout of our home, the master bedroom upstairs is always cold. I don't like climbing into my cold sheets at night and feeling like I'm camping outside in Antarctica. Last week, I remembered a rice bag that has probably gone unused for over a year or so, and have taken to having a child heat it up for me each night and bring to my bed. I love it!

Point two: For some reason last night before bed, Drew asked if he could use the rice bag. I might add, that I think Luke had originally requested it, but somehow (I think it had something to do with him swinging it at a sibling) it ended up in Drew's possession. Somehow later, (I think after Mike caught Drew with it in mid-swing with it ready to hit Joshua) the rice bag was sitting unused in my bedroom, and Joshua politely came in and asked if he could use it. I obliged.

For the first time in a week, last night I fell asleep with cold feet.

This morning, after I had risen from the couch to continue the morning duties with my children (like making sure children have needed library books, making sure papers are signed, lunches in backpacks, teeth are brushed, medication give to child with sore arm due to yesterday's shots, etc. etc. etc.) Joshua said to me, "Mom, if today you aren't doing anything or going anywhere and you have nothing to do, will you  make a rice bag for me to use?"

It wasn't really the fact that making a rice bag will maybe take 10 minutes maximum, it's the fact my son thinks a. I likely am not doing anything or that I have NOTHING to do.

As I hugged and kissed Joshua goodbye at the front door, he again said, "Remember if you have nothing to do today, can you make me a rice bag?"

For the record, I actually have several things to do today, a few places to go, and lots of I "want to get to's". Yet the selfish part of me, remember back to my first paragraph--for whatever reason, I woke up feeling sort of selfish today; begrudging the morning routine, thinking I do wwwaaayyyyy too much for my children, and not feeling guilty that they were eating cold cereal on a mid-week day. (Typically Friday's are the only days they eat cold cereal.), all I could think about was, "I AM NOT GOING TO BED WITH COLD FEET AGAIN TONIGHT. THAT RICE BAG IS MINE."

So, to ensure that Yours Truly gets the rice bag tonight, guess what I spent 30 minutes doing this morning?
Making not one, but 3 rice bags. But I'm beginning to guess, it may have introduced a whole new slew of problems.

1. When Joshua returns home today from school and sees the rice bags, he will be happy. But there is a risk that it will confirm to him that his mother does nothing and had nowhere to go, or nothing to do other than make him a rice bag.

2. Making the rice bags took up the last of a container of rice I'd purchased yesterday at Costco, and so that is one less "storage" of rice I had so proudly added to my storage shelf yesterday. (I may add, we had rice for dinner last night.)

3. Mike isn't interested in using a rice bag. But I only made three, plus the one I have been using, plus one old one I dug out from the recesses of a closet. So that equals 5. There will likely be 6 interested persons in having a rice bag tonight.

4. It is likely one or more rice bags will again be used as a weapon tonight in an effort for the 6th person to acquire one.

5. On the bright side, perhaps someone will lose the privilege of using one, and that will make an easy solution for that problem.

Unfortunately, I have a feeling tomorrow I'll be making one more rice bag.

To answer this morning's rhetorical question to myself while laying on the couch, "Do I do too much for my children?" I answer with a resounding, "YES!!!!"

But I guess that's the price a mother has to pay to go to bed with warm feet.

Whoever Would Have Thought?

Starting the last Saturday in August, we have found ourselves on the sidelines of a football field every Saturday cheering on Joshua. And you know what? I have loved every second of it.

I LOVE this series of photos that depicts a pretty stellar play by Joshua earlier in the season. (Photo credit goes to a mom on the team. (?) Pay close attention to Joshua's ability to get away from his opposition.

You likely don't have to know the Sowby family too well to know that our involvement in organized sports over the years has been next to nothing. This comes from a variety of reasons, not the least being the time commitment it would cause a family of seven for only one child.

Joshua's passion for football has been obvious for over a year now. He plays football, he thinks football, he imagines football, and I'm quite certain, he even breathes it. Mike and I fought somewhat against letting Joshua play tackle football at such a young age, but decided in the end to let him try it.

My introduction to the football league at the beginning during try-outs was nothing short of an emotional wreck for me. I can't really describe it, or rather, shouldn't. But suffice it to say, Joshua got his tonsils out on the 2nd day of practice. The first day of practice when reminding one of the coaches that Joshua was having this surgery done, said, "Oh. But he'll still be here dressed tomorrow night though, right?"

Poor Mike took the brunt of my emotional breakdowns that first week regarding football and the commitment it started to be, but before long, I accepted Mike's advice of, "You've made the decision. Just move forward with it and don't second guess it anymore." 

Joshua's tonsillectomy during tryouts turned out to be a blessing! Due to his spotty involvement during tryouts, he was put on the team with the coach that I had secretly hoped he would get.

I can't say enough nice things about Coach Nate (and his dad, Coach Bryan) and their dedication to a group of 22 boys, several of which often disrupt the lessons being taught. These coaches are patient and kind, and seem to care about teaching these boys skills that will benefit them both on and off the field.

Though there have been plenty of times I've sat on proverbial sidelines and watched my children participate in their various interests and hobbies, there's something about seeing one's child committed to a team, dedicated to his position and giving his all to help secure wins. For almost 3 months now, Joshua has put 6 hours of practice in each week, not counting the games. Over the years, I would have (secretly) chided another family for putting this much time commitment into one child, but not only have we made it work, but Joshua has NEVER complained ONCE about having to miss out on free time, other activities and even a missed opportunity for a family trip. I've joked, "We sold our souls to football this fall" but it's worked, and I've seen a side of parenthood I never imagined I'd see.

Joshua clearly knew upfront that Mike and I were not committing to a "life of football", but only to this one season. Last week while driving home from a game, Joshua very quietly from the back seat said, "I love football. I want to play next year too." I can't help but admit, it  made me smile. I'm not sure I mind giving up another fall season of Saturdays to a football sideline.

Before my maudlin football ramblings get to be a bit much, I'll end by simply saying:

There is no doubt, I am Joshua's biggest fan.

Go Joshua!

Go Braves!

Drew's Last Ride

When Megan was 3 years old, Santa brought her and Luke (6 weeks old) a red Power Wheels jeep. That jeep got years and years of love and use out of it. Except by the time Joshua was old enough to play with it, it was old and had been thrown out. Around that time, we inherited a pink hand-me-down jeep from somewhere, and though it barely worked Joshua discovered he loved it, but the frustration of it never working drove us all crazy.

Our neighbors at this time had a 4-wheeler Power Wheels that rarely got used. It sat in their garage in almost pristine condition and really the only time it was ever ridden was when Joshua would wander over and ask to play with it. Instead of Joshua constantly borrowing it, I offered to buy it from the neighbors, and for a pretty decent price my two younger boys have had hours and hours of play with that thing.

My children have worn the tires bare, Luke once used the seat to cut a piece of leather on, leaving some nice cut marks on it, the trailer has hauled children, hay, candy, and I'm quite sure even Hank the goat once rode in it when he was a baby. I'm fairly certain that little 4-wheeler has logged almost as many miles on it than some people's vehicles.

Except for the last several months the 4-wheeler has mostly sat in our garage in a fairly difficult to get to location. The battery didn't last as long at a time as it once did, and the speed of the 4-wheeler was getting slower and slower even with a "full" battery. Every so often I would think about selling it, but I just couldn't, and neither could Drew or Joshua if they heard me talk about it. We all felt sort of endeared to a silly toy taking up way too much room in our garage, but was so often forgotten because BMX bikes and bike jumps came first.

There are so many "lasts" we never know will be lasts. Which I am actually very grateful for. I know my heart would break far too easily if I knew each last was indeed a last. I'm glad I didn't know whenever it was that Megan grabbed my hand to hold in a store for the last time. Maybe I'm glad I didn't know one time laying in bed with Luke that it was the the last time I was telling him a Little Green Helicopter story. I don't remember knowing whenever it was that Ellie was sucking her thumb for the last time. I don't remember knowing Joshua's last time riding Ellie's hand-me-down pink tricycle that he loved to ride would have been his last.

But for whatever reason, I want to remember today. I want to forever hold in my mind, the picture of Drew climbing on the 4-wheeler and riding it for the last time. Drew rode it from our garage out to the cul-de-sac to a waiting car. And in all honesty, I thought I was going to cry.

I know it is only a 4-wheeler. A tangible, well-worn object that likely doesn't have too many more months of life left in it.  My baby rides a BMX bike and daringly jumps off of jumps. The 4-wheeler is no longer his transportation of choice.

But this morning, Drew's last ride was the end of a long era.

This morning as I was gathering up the charger and battery in anticipation of the "online-yard-sale-site-buyer" coming to purchase it, I remembered the experience buying formula for the last time for Drew that I wrote about HERE. And I knew, I needed to give the 4-wheeler away instead of selling it. My older children thought I was crazy not to get "something out of it" and were all quite willing to take over the transaction, so that I didn't give it away. But I told them they didn't understand. I had to give it away. My mother heart didn't care about making any money from my memories.

As long as the younger-than-me-mother who I gifted the 4-wheeler to this morning gets even an ounce of satisfaction and memories watching her children play on the 4-wheeler, I will always hold dear the memory of Drew's last ride this morning.

(Joshua and Drew--August 2011)

Enjoy the little things in life. One day you'll look back and realize they were the big things.

Megan in Peru

In July 2014, Megan decided she wanted to go to Peru on a HEFY expedition. Though there were several different country options to choose from, Megan has talked about Machu Picchu for years, and the realization that she could actually visit there so soon was thrilling to her. The registration didn't open until December 1st, but from that July day forward, Megan put her heart and soul into making the trip a realization.

Mike made it clear early on that Megan needed to earn 70% of the money towards the experience, and she moved forward with full commitment to make that happen. I wish I had photos of the couple of Saturdays she spent in the kitchen making 100+ Peanut Butter Bars, (one of the times coming down with strep throat in the last hours, but we never told the customers that! ha ha) or the neighborhood pancake breakfast she hosted. But fortunately, our favorite and most successful fundraiser, a neighborhood carnival was captured in pictures by our kind neighbor.

As the time for Megan's departure approached, people kept asking me if I was nervous. I wasn't! I had a little apprehension about her connecting with her group at the LA airport as she was flying from Salt Lake to LA alone, but that left as soon as she went through security and I saw a boy wearing the same shirt and realized he was on her same flight. I was reassured knowing they'd retrieve their luggage and get to the International Terminal in LA together.

I thought once all the preparations were finished (woah! was that hard!) and she was off on her flight, my natural worrying self would over-take, but I truly never worried once. Not once.

It was a long 21/2 weeks with little to no contact with my first-born. Although one of the parent coaches did a fabulous job of updating Instagram with photos, and that was so nice to be part of.

Megan has already finished a short 3 minute video of her Peru highlights. And she plans to have more detailed video reports to follow.

There is so much I want to say about her experience there from a mother's perspective thousands of miles away, but all I really can say is how deeply grateful I am for her to have had this experience. The experience tested and strengthened her physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and socially. She gained insight, personal growth and understanding that I'm sure she will never forget.

How great Megan was able to cross Machu Picchu off her bucket-list at 16 years old!

This is the village of Monterrey that Megan and her group served. As a mother, it is an awe-inspiring feeling to know that my daughter was able to experience and serve such devastating poverty.

Yet despite the poverty, Megan quickly learned the people of that humble village are among the kindest and happiest she has ever met.

 

 This photo shows a lovely "trophy" that was gifted to the HEFY groups by the grateful village. Mike and I were fortunate to see this trophy first-hand when we picked Megan up from the Salt Lake airport, as one of the trip leaders was on her flight. Though I don't read Spanish, the leaders' translation touched me deeply when she read the words, "God bless you always."

Though the group enjoyed downtime at dances, sand-boarding, touring the Lima MTC, and visiting the Lima LDS temple...

The majority of their time was spent physically laboring to build the village a medical center. 

What an honor that Megan's name is engraved on a beautiful plaque that now hangs in a small village in Peru.

The possibilities and examples of service in this world are endless, yet this last week as Megan has told us story after story of her experiences, and as we've seen all the clothing and shoes she DIDN'T bring back home with her, and we've heard stories of the villager's responses to our small gifts and tokens, this Bible scripture keeps coming to my mind.

Matthew 25:35-40
"For I was an hungered, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in: Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungered, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink? When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee? Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me."

We are deeply appreciative to all those who helped make this experience for Megan possible. Not only did people's donations of time and money bless the people of Monterrey, Peru, it has blessed Megan's life, and for that, my mother heart is truly thankful.

(The sign that hung at the entrance to Megan's fundraiser carnival.)