A Back-to-School Story

With all of the recent back-to-school posts on social media recently, I was reminded of this experience last year that I never recorded. It motivated me to write the experience down and make sure it isn't forgotten.

In our family, it is quite traditional for my husband Mike to give "priesthood blessings" the night before a new school year.

Last year, for whatever reason, instead of assuming each child wanted a blessing, Mike asked the children to tell him if they wanted one, and he would happily oblige. Four out of five of the children asked for one. One child, my oldest son, Luke did not. {Here I want to  to say, that though I do put faith into Priesthood blessings, I have always been a firm believer that the sincere prayers of mothers are heard in the same light.} However, with Luke starting a brand new school-junior high no less-I was somewhat disappointed at Luke's lack of desire for any heavenly help.

Sending my first-born to junior high 4 years ago was very difficult for me. Likely due in part to my own difficult experiences with junior high after moving to one from another country! Sending my second child to one last year felt just as hard as it had been with my first. Actually though, it felt worse. Typically confident and fearless Luke acted more nervous than Megan ever had. I think exasperated by the fact that at the 7th grade orientation day just a few days previously, Luke could not figure out how to open his locker.

We practiced and we practiced and we practiced. I was determined to not leave the orientation until Luke had it mastered, but it was clear that either a faulty locker, or Luke's inability to master the lock was causing frustration and embarrassment. Instead, I suggested we take a deep breath,  leave the school and maintain high hopes that on the following Monday morning it would work for him.

Back to the Sunday night before school.

My mother heart could tell Luke was heading to bed nervous, yet neither my husband or I felt it appropriate to force any issue of a priesthood blessing thinking it may calm him. One of the last things Luke said to me before he fell asleep that night was, "Maybe I'll just take WD40 to school with me. That will help with the locker."

The next morning, I'm not sure who was more nervous for junior high. Luke or me! One of the first things out of Luke's mouth upon waking up and facing the daunting reality of his first day of junior high was, "I've figured it out. I know what I'll do, I am taking a screwdriver to school with me. That WILL open the locker."

My tough, can-do-nearly-anything-12-year-old son was nervous for junior high. He wouldn't admit it. He didn't admit it. But I knew. My mother heart knew he was nervous, and I knew the deepest root of his nervousness was that darn locker. Luke built a scooter when he was 5, he could change a flat tire on his bike at age 6, he built a make-shift shed when he was 10 and has likely outdone his peers on building or creating numerous projects.

But my then 12 year old, couldn't independently open his locker at 7th grade orientation.

Luke allowed me to walk him to the bus-stop his first morning of junior high. We didn't say much to each other besides me defending my decision that he couldn't take WD40 or a screwdriver to school. One of the last things I said to him, as a sort of consolation for none of his desired tools was, "Luke-I'll be praying for you."

And I did.
I prayed all day.
If I wasn't on my knees praying, I was praying in my heart. If I wasn't praying in my heart, I was praying aloud while going about my chores. My prayers centered around one thing.
Luke and his ability to open his locker.

Luke returned home later that day and of course one of my first questions to him was, "How did the locker go?" He looked at me, as though he didn't have any recollection of it ever being an issue and simply said, "It opened every single time."

With tears streaming down my face, I placed Luke's face in my hands and looked him in the eyes and quietly asked him a question, I didn't need him to answer.

"Luke. Who needs WD40 or a screwdriver, when you have a mother who prays?"

There are a variety of explanations one can offer for Luke's first day of junior high, but there is only one that matters.

I have no doubt that there are few things more powerful than the sincere prayers of a mother. I am grateful that Luke and I learned firsthand that day, that a mother's prayer can transcend an earthly trouble.

Two Patients Not THREE

Joshua and Luke had their tonsils out on Tuesday morning. After 10+ bouts of strep throat since December, we're hopeful this procedure puts an end to it. In addition to the removal of tonsils (and adenoids), Joshua also had a procedure done on his tongue, which has set him back a little more than Luke. (He can't lift/move his tongue much and so it makes eating a little trickier for him, and more pain than his throat alone.)

Upon being given the hospital gowns to wear, the boys became a little too animated and excited. I think perhaps it was a combination of nerves and the fact Luke was given lavender colored pants and a star gown to wear.

Poor Luke. It didn't help that he didn't comb his hair that morning.

Joshua went to surgery first and thus was done first. By the time we saw him, we was fairly awake and alert.

I think he felt like he had to stay awake for us, but we assured him he could sleep. We certainly weren't relying on him for conversation.

Luke was wheeled into the recovery room while we were with Joshua. Typically they don't allow parents to come in there for a while, and though they kept the curtains around Luke so we couldn't see them wake him up initially, they called us over to him probably sooner than they would have had we not already been in the room.

They warn you before surgery that everyone wakes up from anesthesia differently. Yet it still came as a little bit of a surprise for Luke to:

a. tell the nurse to "Shut up!" when she asked him a question

b. kick me when I was rubbing his leg

c. tell Mike to "Stop! Go away." when Mike said, "Hi Luke."

The nurses assured me they have "seen and heard it all" and told me not to apologize for Luke's abruptness. I still did. I'm not exactly going to stand by and laugh with them when my son covered his face and told everyone to stop talking to him and LET HIM SLEEP.

Within a few minutes, Luke and Joshua were wheeled into the final recovery room. Luke was a completely different person! He was pleasant and saying all sorts of "Please" and "Thank yous" to the nurses questions of slushes, drinks, and pain.

Luke had/has absolutely no recollection of his earlier outbursts to those caring for him. So I'm quite confident it was the anesthesia talking and not him.

I've been extra-attentive to the boys since their surgery. I've been checking on them frequently, getting them popsicles, ice cream, drinks, etc. It's a fair amount of work, as I tend to stay downstairs and they are spending most of their day upstairs. Drew has sort of been laying low with them.

Here's an example of an exchange: "Hey boys! Are you guys doing okay?" To which DREW will respond, "Yeah. I'm fine." And then 30 minutes later or so, I hollered, "Hey boys! Do you want a popsicle or something?" To which DREW responded, "Yes. Get me an Otter Pop."

Note to Drew: You ARE NOT the patient.
Luke and Joshua are.

Warning: May Cause Disease

In this day and age, my parenting peers are discussing the effects of screen time on their children, how to manage it, how to work around it when parents aren't home, what time restrictions to place on it, etc. etc. etc. I always assume that people think I am exaggerating when I tell them that we really don't have any rules or regulations about screen time. (Duh-of course we do about appropriate sites, etc.) But time limits? Not at all necessary. We have the absolute opposite at our house. We have to set limits and regulations on their imaginations. 

While I ran a billion after-school errands with Megan for her upcoming Carnival Fundraiser this Saturday, I returned home to this:

"We're making home-made rafts." ~ said one child

"Did Dad give permission for the wood to be used?" ~said the parent

"It's old wood." ~said another child

"What exactly do you need rafts for?~ said the parent

"To play in water." ~ said a child

"What water?" ~ said the parent

"Water in the pasture. And when that dries up, we'll take them somewhere else to use." ~said the same child

"What is going on?" ~ said the other parent who arrived home minutes after the first parent

"Did you ask permission for the wood?" ~ said the other parent

A short time later, we could hear laughter and happy squealing all the way across the field to our pasture. Megan, being the first to ascertain where the laughter was originating from suddenly declared, "They look like neglected children."

To which my eyes wander to where she is looking and I behold this sight.
Neglected children?
Not really, they actually get a lot of attention.

Imaginative children?
Yes.

(See the broken wheel on the red wagon? That would be from it being used to descend the hill and ride into the water.)

I walked over to get a closer look, and though all my responsible, clean, uptight personality traits wanted to yell and tell them to get their clothes on and get OUT OF THE MUDDY WATER immediately, the part of my personality that understands they are only young once, and the soft, motherly part of my personality that heard, "Mom! Are you mad at us? This is the best day EVER." simply took some photos, and told them to come home in 10 minutes.

I didn't get any "after photos" of the mud strewn across their faces and bodies, or of them standing in their underwear in the back yard while I hosed them down with a hose. To which they complained about the temperature of the cold water. To which I responded, if you can play in mud puddles, you pay the price of a cold hose squirted at you before you're allowed into the house to shower.

Megan is concerned they are going to catch cholera. My BFF is concerned they are going to get ticks. My only concern is what will they think of next!

Permanent Records

From a fairly young age I have loved writing in a journal. I wrote my first journal entry when I was 4 years old in my green hardback journal. I wrote on and off for years growing up, and then when I was about 13, I wrote faithfully daily up until the day I got married. It's been spotty for the past 18 years, but lately, I've been rededicated to writing regularly in my personal journal. (There's just soooo much I don't want to forget about life in all of its ups and downs.)

Every so often I do my best to get my children to follow suit and write regularly in journals too. Ellie is the only one that does it on her own, and I LOVE IT!! Luke is asked to do it every so often, and it is probably one of his least favorite things to do. But like I told him a couple of weeks ago, when there was apparently "nothing to write about." "Just write about ANYTHING!You'll be happy you have recorded the daily stuff of your life."

He must have got the idea, because he proceeded to write about an incident that will likely be fun (for some?) to remember one day. Luke gave a brief synopsis of the event (he is required to do at least 6-8 sentences!), but instead of taking a photo of his version (privacy?), I'll share briefly my own version of it.

On a pleasant Sunday afternoon two weeks ago, Joshua walked into the house from playing in the backyard wearing only his underwear. Of course I was immediately alerted to something being wrong and I asked him what in the world he was doing, and WHERE. WERE. HIS. CLOTHES?!?

As I looked at the family room window to the trampoline, and listened to Joshua's version of the incident, it all fell into place. Luke, Joshua, Drew and a couple of neighbor boys were jumping on the trampoline, when Luke thought it would be funny to chain Joshua to the side of the trampoline and see if he could get himself free. Which Joshua was able to do...but he had to leave his clothes chained to the trampoline in order to gain freedom.

I didn't laugh (at the time). I went outside, yelled at Luke, sent the neighbor boys home, and instructed Joshua to go back and retrieve his clothes. Luke's defense was, he wouldn't have done it to anyone but his own brothers. Mike laid on the couch throughout the whole incident trying not to laugh.

Someone asked me the other day, why I don't write blog posts as much anymore. She complimented me on being funny and writing well in the past, and asked why I stopped. I didn't really have an answer, except to say, that maybe as my children get older, they do less funny things, or more accurately, they do things that are sorta funny/sorta questionable. Such as chaining a brother up to a trampoline and him having to strip down to his undies to get free. Perhaps good judgement would say to keep it in the personal journals only. But here we are. (Which really, now that I think about it...sharing the yellow snow incident a few years ago was questionable too.)

(Joshua drew a picture of the trampoline experience in his journal later that evening to go along with the above entry.)

It just so happened Drew chose the exact same thing to write and draw about that Sunday evening too.

And now I have a whole blog post about an incident I had no intention of recording. I was going to write about journals and how much I love Ellie's journals that she always invites me to read. (I'll give her privacy and won't take a photo of them.) I love how much she writes about herself. Love it! She'll surely treasure those written monologues one day.

Megan on the other hand, has discovered a new way to record her life.
Oh boy.
Megan's biggest fan is herself, and her newest hobby is perfect for her.
Vlogging.
She can talk all she wants to a camera and nobody has to interrupt her to get a word in, or tell her to stop talking.
And she gets to edit the hours of her chatter to her greatest priority. It's quite a good hobby for a self-proclaimed narcissist. (insert winky face)

You can watch her introductory vlog here. (And if you really love it...there's more on YouTube!)

Now. Go record something permanent yourself!
You won't regret it.

Luke and Mike

Merely a coincidence that the two most recent blog posts are about Luke. Onto other children later...

On Instagram recently, a friend commented on a photo, "I wish I was one of your children, I'd like to see what trip I'd get to go on."

She was referring to the fact that Luke and Mike were in Seattle, WA at the NFL kick-off game with between the Green Bay Packers and Seattle Seahawks .

Which I must explain...
In June 2013, we went on a family trip to California. We had an okay time, but for the most part, it was a nightmare.

A. NIGHTMARE.

More than once Mike and I looked at each other wondering what in the world we were doing, and I'm quite sure Mike swore on his life that he'd never go on a family vacation again.

With the combination of that less than stellar family vacation experience, and a high number of airline rewards points we have experimented with a new style of travel this year. In the winter, I took the two little boys to Disneyland, and we have been anticipating a trip to NYC this fall with our girls. One night in July, I started brainstorming about "trip ideas" for Luke and suddenly thought of a football game. His two favorite teams are the Packers and Seahawks, and so I looked at the schedules of each.

I could not believe my eyes that late Sunday night while laying in my bed, with my i-pad in my hand, when I saw that the Packers and the Seahawks were due to play each other on a THURSDAY night and in SEATTLE. (A much more desired destination than Wisconsin?) We had enough miles for free flights, and not knowing anything about typical NFL football ticket prices, it seemed like it was a trip worth making happen.

I take full credit for the idea, the booking, the accommodations, the preparation, the activity agenda, the printed directions, the instructions, the packing, etc. Mike gets full credit for paying for it.

Little did I know that when I bought the tickets, it was the NFL kick-off game. A pretty big deal in the world of NFL.

Megan is an avid football fan herself (this is just her 2nd season), but she is far more excited about an upcoming trip to NYC. She rallied the siblings around her for the big game and they watched it on tv, on slightly damp couches that had been professionally clean that day. (Our whole house was in complete disarray from the carpets being cleaned earlier in the day.)

The rest is pretty much history. Although I must make a disclaimer--that there are no spoiled children around here. These trips are no different than a family trip somewhere for the seven of us, and no trip would happen if we had to actually "pay" for the plane ticket. (We haven't "paid" for a plane ticket for a couple of years now...)

(I totally take credit for their plane seats being on the side that had a great view of Mount. St. Helen's volcano. Go me. (Sheer coincidence/luck.))

Anyway,
Back to Mike and Luke...

 (The view from their room. They're welcome. (Again...pure coincidence/luck.)

 (I loved visiting Seattle last September, and was so excited they got to see the Gum Wall that I had told them so much about.)

They spent a wonderful time together in Seattle last week. Luke wore his Packer's jersey to the game with his Seahawks t-shirt underneath. The day after the game, as they explored the city, Luke wore a Packers hat with a Seahawks shirt. Mike said he got humorous comments all day long from passers-by.

Mike loved it. And even though he did choke a little at the price of the trip, I know he is glad they went and I, we made it happen. Mike's comment to me the evening of their return?

"It was all so low-key. It was really nice, just being Luke and me. Even you there would have changed the dynamic drastically. We were both really laid-back, relaxed and had a great time."

Separately, Luke reported to me, "It was so fun just me and dad. I hope you know what I mean, but I'm even glad you weren't there."

Not quite sure exactly HOW to interpret either of those comments.

And that my friends is probably why full-seven-member-family-vacations are not really in our plans anymore.

Grand Champion

Did I really not blog much this summer? Ugh. I'm rarely one to go back and catch up, but I can't possibly neglect to record Luke's experience at the Davis County Fair this year.

This was the 4th year in a row that Luke entered his goat(s) into the Davis County Fair. Last year, I finally realized the fairs weren't so bad after all if:

a. I have no other children with me
b. I bring plenty to read and/or do and realize no one keeps to a schedule
c. I wear closed toe shoes

This year, I was ready for it. A week before, I was mentally prepared for a day at the fair, complete with a good book to read, some closed shoes and nothing on the schedule that would mean Megan couldn't babysit the other children for me. I found myself actually looking forward to it.

And then a dear friend passed away, and I received news that her funeral was on the same day as the fair. The same day. The same time.

I cried plenty of tears that a dear lady I loved had passed away, and I shed a few tears that I would miss Luke at the fair. Luke completely understood my absence, and I sent my best wishes and luck to him, and promised I'd check my phone frequently during the funeral for photos.

The funeral I attended was wonderful. It was a touching tribute to a mother whose 6 grown children spoke lovingly and humorously of life with her as a mother. I found myself reflecting on my own mothering throughout the funeral, and the fact I wasn't with Luke did pull at my heart a fair amount.

Just as the funeral was nearing the end, I received a text from Mike with the following photo that read, "Packer was just announced as the Grand Champion."

 

"What????" was my simple reply.
Then I shed a little tear that I wasn't there.

My friend who was being honored that day, read my blog regularly. She would comment frequently to me about my children, my writings, and my musings. She wasn't much of a lady for fanfare or attention, and would likely had advised me to go to the fair instead of her funeral. But like I told Luke, there will be plenty of opportunities for me to attend more county fairs, but that was my only opportunity to attend a tribute to her.

Besides, he has a good story to tell at my funeral one day...
"My mother attended lots of boring county fairs where my goats didn't win anything. But one year, my goat won Grand Champion of them all and it just so happened that was the one year my mother wasn't there..."

My Son, The Scouting Over-Achiever

I have admitted before that I am not a fan of the Boy Scouts of America as they are associated with The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I have nothing against the BSA as an organization, my issue is simply that by default of being an active member of the LDS church, we as parents/families "sign up" for what I think should be an extra-curricular choice of time/money/commitment, etc.

Mike and I have the mind-set that we will support our children in scouting to the extent they wish to be involved. We hold no esteem to the achieving of specific scouting awards, as we feel strongly there are other avenues for boys (and girls for that matter) to reach the same end goals.

As such, we sent Luke off to scout camp the other week having no idea he would come home a scouting star! That kid of OURS earned the most merit badges in the whole camp (200+/- boys), and was one of two boys at the camp to swim a mile. Luke spent the afternoon he returned home researching requirements for future merit badges and wouldn't stop talking about the timeline towards earning longer term rewards.

As Mike and I have stated before, we will support Luke (and Joshua and Drew that will follow) to the extent to which they want to be involved in it. Which at this point with Luke, is translating into a whole lotta BSA talk. That boy is intense. He wears me out.

 

(As a favor to my dear husband, I'll refrain from my long blog post about how this FULL scout uniform came about. He has heard the story one too many times.)

(Think this picture is quite telling of how Mike spent his 36 hours as a father chaperone at scout camp...)

And that's all I'll say about scouting for today.
Lucky you!

The Ordinary

One evening in late March, Drew ran an errand with Mike over to our office. I'm not exactly sure why Drew was wearing his swimming suit, and I'm pretty sure the temperature wasn't any higher than the 60's, but nonetheless Drew went. Turns out they made an unexpected visit to The Chief (friend in the next office over), and Mike captured this beauty of Drew deep in conversation. I think I should begin a scientific study as to why Drew's little bum crack is more often than not...exposed.

Unfortunately, Mike and I are not the kind of parents to laugh at all of our children's antics. Too often we're irritated about the children's poor timing and/or lack of judgement to give into the capers of youth. It seems they always attempt their comedian acts right around bedtime, when Mike and I are not typically in easily entertainable moods. However, one particular night when Ellie stalled the bedtime routine to return downstairs to show us this hairstyle, we couldn't help but laugh.

My in-laws are great to invite my children to their house to sleep-over. Apparently, Joshua and Drew put on quite the "Pirate Show" for them.

You'd think perhaps I should let this next photo be a blog post of its own, but not this time. There's getting to be too many...Meet Packer, (as in Green Bay Packers) Luke's newest goat. Which I will take 100% responsibility for adding to the family. Hank was getting to be lonely, and Luke felt badly for him, which in turn made me feel badly for both Luke and Hank. Luke kept saying he wished Hank had a friend, and I would think, "Oh dear! How lonely for Hank not to have a friend!" and Mike would roll his eyes and say Luke has enough animals and tasks to keep him busy, and then Luke would look at me and I'd think about lonely ole Hank outside all day by himself, and so I, yes, I took Luke to get this new goat. It is actually Dudley's brother from the same litter, which of course endeared him to me even more. What?? Why oh why are goats endearing themselves to me?????????????

(Mike rolled his eyes when I told him I teared up while taking this photo of Packer and Hank meeting for the first time. Or maybe he was rolling his eyes because I was tearing up about it still hours later when telling Mike about the meeting. Roll your eyes if you must, but I see the beginning of a tender goat friendship here.)

When the stomach flu went the rounds of all seven of us last week, I tried not to mentally blame Joshua for being the first to get it and thus pass it all along to us. But then I see his sad, sick face in this photo and wonder what kind of mother was I to think it was his fault?

(Yes, we use empty ice buckets as throw up buckets around here. In fact, Ellie returned from somewhere recently and was describing the ice cream they had at the event: "It was the ice cream that you get in throw-up buckets.") 

Megan thinks she is hilarious and wanted to trick everyone into thinking this was jello in the glasses. Upon the "fool" lifting up the glass it was discovered it was nothing more than colored water and we had quite the mess to clean up.

Such is life around here.

“You need to let the little things that would ordinarily bore you suddenly thrill you.” 

― Andy Warhol

Reputations Lead to Horses

Up until early last summer, Luke rode horses weekly at a local riding arena for over two years. He traded work in exchange for his riding lessons, but his love for the style of riding he was doing waned. I'm not sure Luke has the patience for the slower "reigning" type riding, and he decided he no longer wanted to ride weekly. Luke's two instructors, Jim and Tiffany were sad to lose him. Luke made a way into their hearts and their love for Luke was obvious in their repeated phone calls asking and offering him to come ride anytime.

Two weeks ago, while in the recesses of my closet in the middle of an organization project, his instructor, Tiffany called me. Not only was I shocked she was calling, but by the end of the call, I was quite speechless. (That's rare.)

A person that Jim and Tiffany know is "retiring" from riding horses and has an older, well-trained horse he wants to give away to someone who would love and care for it. Jim and Tiffany immediately thought of Luke, and thus the phone call.

Mike and I spent a couple of days in secret deliberation. We weighed the costs of responsibility, finances, time and effort that adding a horse to our crew would bring. Cryptically, one afternoon, Mike took Luke to "meet the horse." Despite the fact our friend, and great horseman, Spence "went along for the ride", Luke was pretty clueless about the whole thing and believed that Tiffany simply wanted Luke to "test out a horse for them." Spence quietly observed and gave Mike the opinion and advice Mike needed. (The horse was very well trained and looked very well taken care of.)

That evening, Mike and I told Luke and Joshua the truth... We told them the story of the guy wanting the horse to have a loving home, and that we were considering letting Luke, Joshua and Drew become horse owners. We helped Luke understand that he had earned himself a good reputation, and these people recommended him to be a responsible, loving person for someone to trust giving away the horse they have loved for years. We told the boys we needed a couple of days to make a decision, and for them too, to be thinking of the choice.

Mike and I ultimately turned the decision over to the boys. We wanted them to "own" the choice, and therefore feel more ownership in the whole decision. Especially considering they would need to contribute a fair amount financially to the horse's upkeep, and nearly all of the effort into the daily care.

Mike wasn't home when the deadline for our decision came and I sat the boys down to ask them to give us their decision. I was careful to explain to them, that getting a horse opens up our hearts to heartache and sadness when the animal comes time to leave us. We have been very careful to explain to the children that this is an older horse and could live for one year, or five. There are no guarantees.

Of course, there was really no decision to make. Joshua and Luke wholeheartedly and enthusiastically agreed that they would take on the responsibility of a horse.

Drew on the other hand didn't share the same enthusiasm. He had no smile on his face, and his lips were in a slightly pouty position. Disappointed he sighed, "I really wanted a cow."

His disappointment about not getting a cow only lasted about a week, until he decided instead, "I want to buy a polar bear to live with Hank. I really want to have two white things live outside."

Later that day, Champ arrived in our cul-de sac.

Maybe Drew wasn't too excited on Friday afternoon when a truck and horse trailer arrived in our cul-de-sac, and a horse exited instead of a polar bear.
But Joshua and Luke were thrilled.

Meet Champ.
The Sowby Family's newest addition.

Luke introducing Champ to his room-mate, Rocko.

Two happy boys.