Joyful Kids

Recently I wrote a journal entry about how and why I find joy in mothering.  Though a lot of it I'm choosing to keep in my personal journal, obviously, I wouldn't be able to find joy in mothering without finding joy in my children.  And that is something, of course I need to record in our family history (it's 2010, so a blog it is!).

Drew-
I love when Drew clenches his fist and laughs a big fake laugh. I love when he wakes up in the morning and grins ear to ear when he first sees me. I love hearing the pitter-patter run of his feet on the tile floor. I love his blank funny looking crooked facial expressions with his head tilted just so. I love that he lays his head down on my shoulders and starts humming the tune to "I Love To See The Temple" or "I Hope They Call Me on A Mission."

Joshua-
I love that each morning, Joshua runs to where I am in the house with open arms and a big hug as though he hasn’t seen me in days. I love his word pronunciations with no ‘r’ or ‘l’ sounds. I love that he still wants ‘holdies’ . I love that he says the word ‘actually’ when he changes his mind about something. I love the way he stares at photos or pictures of cowboys with a longing in his eyes. I love his facial expressions. I love that he wears almost the same outfit everyday.And I love his random thoughts, like when he was getting out of the car at Grandma Laurie's house recently, dressed in his cowboy garb, complete with hat and rope, he announced, "There's nothing to 'wope' here. I should have brought some calves." (?!?)

Ellie
I love Ellie's sleepy face in the mornings. I love her grown-up expressions and conversations. I love her love of baby dolls and hearing her call them (or her little brothers) 'sweetheart'. I love the grocery bags that she fills with paper, notebooks, etc to go and play. I love that she loves shoes.   I love her quiet, pondering face.  I love that she wants so badly to be grown up, but is still a little girl. I love (ok, not really) that I sometimes still catch her sucking her thumb.

Luke
I love Luke's unique personality and his desire and confidence to like what he likes. I love (ok, not always) his constant chatter. I love that Luke's eyes can't help but light up when he sees me at the school, even though his body language tries to say he doesn’t notice me/or care I'm there. I love the way he stares out the window as we pass horse fields until they are out of view.  I love his inquisitive mind and his desire to work hard. I love that he tells me he plays with Ellie at recess.

Megan
I love Megan's maturity. I love (ok not always) that she mothers her siblings. I love that I never have to worry if she’ll remember her manners and be polite and respectful. I love that she explores her talents. I love that she is full of energy and always has something to say. I love her desire to be kind to others. I love that she told me about seeing Ellie at school and the proud look on Megan's face when she said, "Ellie really is the cutest first grader."

(Megan and Cousin Annie)

Of course in reality a few of these joys (ie. constant chatter, hearing someone mother her siblings and a sleepy morning self) also cross over into whatever the antonym of joy is... And though my house is rarely quiet; if it isn’t a tantrum it is an over excited child that needs to wind down, if it isn’t a musical instrument, it is a drill sound coming from the garage, if it isn’t laughter, it is screaming (Drew’s latest antic), if it isn’t tattling, it is whining, and so on and so forth...

But truly, I find joy in my children.
... most of the time

A Memory For Monday (With Granny & Grandad Next Door)

Just this last Saturday afternoon, I chose Megan and Luke to accompany me to Costco.  Considering it was a Saturday at one of the busiest stores around, it was quite a pleasant trip.  Taking into consideration my regular shopping entourage; a three year old and a one year old... shopping with an almost twelve year old and almost nine year old was sheer bliss.

As we approached the check-out stand, we passed the part of Costco I usually try to quickly pass by without a sideways glance.  (Chocolate covered almonds, chocolate covered raisins, Costco size package of Lindt chocolate, etc. etc.)  Yet for some reason on Saturday, in my more relaxed than usual, frame of mind, (Not having to deal with a three year old and one year old while shopping does wonders for positive mental health...) I glanced to the side and a box of assorted chocolates immediately caught my eye.

And for some reason, as I picked up the box of assorted chocolates to look at, I got a big lump in my throat and in a sudden moment of nostalgia, I began to tell my children about Granny and Grandad Next Door...

Growing up on Carlton Crescent, we lived next door to an elderly couple.  I can't even tell you what their names were, because to us, they were Granny and Grandad Next Door.  (My paternal grandparents were also known as Granny and Grandad to us, so the Next Door was always added as clarification.)

Grandad Next Door had an immaculate garden.  His tulips in the spring and roses in the summer were a beautiful sight.  It was not very often we had much association with them besides greetings and chats across a garden fence, or the occasional knock at the door to retrieve a ball.

But, if you did for some reason go into their house, we were always taken into the back room, where Granny Next Door was always sitting (she didn't venture outside nearly as much as Grandad Next Door).   And there was always a tin with Kit-Kats inside and a box of assorted chocolates sitting on a table, that we were invited to choose from.

So there I stood amidst scores of shoppers in Costco on a Saturday, blinking away tears while telling my children about Granny and Grandad Next Door's flower gardens and the smell of their house. It was that simple memory of our kind, gracious, elderly neighbors that caused me to arrive home from Costco on Saturday with a box of assorted chocolates.

But the real laughter and appreciation from the children (and Mike) came later in the afternoon while we were each eating a chocolate.  I told them about the time a neighbor friend and I decided to make homemade perfume by mixing talcum powder and water together in old baby juice bottles to sell.  I told them about selling a bottle to Grandad Next Door and was scared and didn't know what to say or do when Grandad Next Door handed me his ten pence piece and said, "Thank you very much. Granny will really enjoy drinking this."

Hopefully Grandad Next Door's purchase was simply a courtesy to a young neighbor girl and he didn't offer  to Granny Next Door what he had mistakenly understood was a drink...

Happy Monday!

Around Here

Saturday morning as I approached the neighborhood after exercising, I saw Ellie leaving the doorstep of the neighbor's house down the street.  Fortunately, I hadn't been a few minutes later.  Or, I may have not got the chance to tell the dad, to "Ignore the invitation that was just delivered.  There is no tea party at our house at one o'clock today."  Sound familiar?

Luke shocked us all by saying 'math' and 'fun' in the same sentence!!!!!!!!!!  Luke loves his new school teacher  and is enthusiastically relaying keyboarding lessons, reading in the classroom tent, and math games.  Although enthusiastic in nearly all areas of his life, school (and piano) show the least enthusiasm.  As parents we are thrilled at this added enthusiasm.

Megan spent a night with Grandma Laurie and came home with the recently purchased material, sewn into a skirt.  I'm sure there was plenty more love and harmony between Grandma Laurie and Megan during the cutting out material and sewing than during the hemming part Megan and I finished at home....  That part wasn't so loving and harmonious...

While driving through downtown Salt Lake City recently, I spontaneously told Mike to stop the car and took a few of the kids on a Trax train ride though the free fare zone of the city.  Joshua didn't stop smiling.

It is a proud moment 95% of the time when Drew is asked 'Where's your nose?' he gets it right and there is no laughter from siblings.  (The other 5% of the time his finger goes up his nostril and laughter is heard from sibling onlookers...)

And that's about as exciting as our life gets around here!

Parenting at it's Finest

Recently Mike sent me the following photo, courtesy of his cell phone...

 (Drew's shorts had previously been removed after he was literally stuck in some wet mud almost up to his calves and could not move...)

Recently, we were at an outdoor party complete with live music, great food, good company and some ______.

Back to the photo:
I'm not sure if Drew got placed in the horse trough during the aforementioned party,
a. for a good photo opportunity
b. because he wanted to
c. so Mike didn't have to keep chasing him
or,
d. because Drew had drank a little too much beer earlier to notice where he was standing...

And that part is no lie.

While relaxing, visiting and enjoying the evening, I glanced over at Drew just in time to see him with a beer bottle up to his mouth and his head tilted back....

Despite the fact, it would have made for a great photo memory,  I opted instead for responsible parenting and quickly ran to his side, removed the bottle from his grasp, wiped the beer from his lip and reminded myself that I've never ever claimed to be in the running for Mother of the Year...

A Memory for Monday (September 1996)

Following the Sunday evening on the hammock with Mike, I continued on with my plans to go to England.  (Yes Susie, of course, I saw you during that trip!)  

I promised Mike I would send him a postcard every single day.  (I now know Mike well enough to know, he probably didn't really care if he got a postcard or not, but he went a long with my kind gesture.)  In fact, I came across these postcards just a few weeks ago, and really was quite amazed how much information I publicly shared in an-anyone-can-read-it-postcard.  (Especially his mother who probably got to the mail, long before he did...)

I also tried calling Mike once, on Labor Day.  Thinking he would be home, I called his house, but he was boating at the lake.  When his mother asked if he could call me back, I replied, "No, it's ok.  I"m in England, by the time he gets home it will be too late here." 

(Mel and Tiff at one of my very favorite places in the whole world; Boxhill, England, 1996)

My trip to England was a great two weeks of contemplation.  Aided by my BFF joining me for the last week there.  In between me tour guiding and Melanie being the tourist, we daydreamed, made bets, and speculated of my future with Mike.

And it was on this trip, that I had my last serious, deep conversation with my beloved Granny.  I told her that I thought maybe I would marry Mike.  Her reply was, "I know you will marry a good man. You needn't think too much about it."

And really, to make a long story short.
I came home nervous, anxious, excited and thrilled to see Mike.
A few days after returning home, Mike and I, hmmm, how should I put it?

After more than two years of being friends, we moved forward...

(I know my eyes are closed, but remember this was in the days before digital cameras to see your picture.  

Melanie, Tiffany, Brett and  Mike--and their London Policeman hats we brought them back as souvenirs.)

Within a couple of weeks, we knew we would get married. And so with me attending the University of Utah full time, working three jobs and him running his landscaping company, and forty miles between us we 'dated' for the next five months, before actually deciding to get a ring, set a date and move forward.

But the love story isn't over yet.
And I'm not talking about now.

I'm talking about the day Mike proposed...

Stay tuned for why I went into the ladies bathroom stall at a restaurant to cry on the day Mike proposed and why I pinched Mike's cheek really hard after him proposing....

Happy Monday!

An Outdoor Carnefel

Friday night was time again for another Family 'Carnefel.'  Of course, as usual, each child was responsible to come up with an activity (or two) for all to join in. 

This time we had a few firsts...
Not only was it outside, but we had our good friends and neighbors, Kellen, Kari, Miles and not quite two week old baby Damon join us, and a prize table!

(The only condition of our friends joining us was that they didn't laugh at what to us, is so normal...creative kids, unique activities, etc. etc.)

The 'timed straw sucking to move paper stars activity', courtesy of Megan (Which Megan won.)

(Megan) (Ellie)

The 'dropping a small disc up high into a bowl' activity, courtesy of Ellie. Which after participating, won you three Starburst.  Kari won this game.

(Ellie, Kellen and Daddy) (Megan, Kari and Miles)

The "'mechanican' bull on the trampoline so you don't get hurt", courtesy of Luke.   I'm not sure who actually won.

 (Luke and Joshua Luke and Ellie)

Throwing balls into a bowl of dyed green water, courtesy of Megan.  Which Your's Truly skillfully won.

(Back of Megan, Kellen, back of Miles, Ellie and Drew)

Roping the calf, courtesy of Luke.  Which, Kellen, a former rodeo roper, won.

(Ellie)

A timed obstacle course, courtesy of Megan.  Which Daddy clearly won in just eleven seconds!

(Ellie and Mom)

And with the small paper stars Megan distributed to all based on participation and scores, was the chance to pick out prizes at the end.  The prize table, courtesy of Dad's money, Mom's time and Megan's effort was a big hit.

(Megan and Luke)

And of course we can't ignore the impromptu sand-box playing and the jalepeno eating contest that no-one but Mike and Megan were dumb enough, did.

(Megan and Mike) 

(Miles and Drew)

And that is how we spent Friday night. 

Nobody Told Me

The part I dislike most about baby/wedding showers is the 'give advice' part.
But maybe I should have actually listened. Because there are lots of things lately that catch me by surprise just a little and I think....

Nobody told me:

That when a bike helmet is nowhere to be found, it is because it got thrown in the outside garbage by the 3 year old--the day before garbage day!

That there would be socks everywhere. Bedrooms, kitchen floors, mudroom floor, shoe baskets, in the car. Socks are all over the place.

That sometimes my tongue would quite literally be sore from biting it one too many times, when an argument with a spouse may not quite be worth it that day.

That children rarely notice discomfort when a swimming suit or underwear  is on backwards, or has gone awry. 

That a child gets out a new cup each time they need a drink of water, resulting in an inability to see the counter tops. 

That some children will not care where their toothbrush has been found (next to the toilet, in the toy room), they will still use it.

That when children are missing something. They will ask you where it is, before looking in the actual place it belongs.

That sometimes husbands and wives should sometimes go to bed mad at each other. Why spew a bunch of meaningless words? Just go to sleep back to back, each clinging to their edge of the bed so there is no possiblity of any feet or arms accidentally touching. You can talk about it in the morning.

That if the beaters to the Kitchen-Aid mixer are missing, I should look in the kitchen trash can.

That toddlers don't care if there is an ant hill growing on a piece of cracker left on the floor. They will still eat it.

I've never been one to disperse advice to others at showers or weddings, etc. I'm certainly in no position to give it....

Besides, the only piece of advice I have actually remembered from one of my wedding/baby showers was, "SMILE." But I don't always take it to heart, in fact, I don't always remember it. Because honestly, some days, I'd much rather cry.