Random Joshua Thoughts

Mike and I were recently remembering a phrase Luke used for everything when he was about three years old.  "Pump down" or "Pumping it down" or "Make it pump down" or some varied form of the words was used to describe anything from a sprinkler spraying, to the tub water emptying or putting gas in a car.  Shortly after Mike and I laughed at the memory the other night, in true Tiffany fashion,  I began to worry that I adequately recorded somewhere Luke's "Pump Down" phrases.

And so to prevent any future worry of whether or not I recorded Joshua's unique phrases, I've gotta get it done now.

I love Joshua's use of the language. I love that he doesn't sound his 'L's' or 'R's' or 'Y's' properly and I love that he has funny pronunciations of things:

"We have a 'SKAprise' for you." (surprise)
"I'm getting in the SKAburban." (suburban)
"I will put it in the "gers" room.  (girls)

I love that when we were at Costco a couple of weeks ago Joshua asked, "Can I get a churro at the Food Inception."  And then later at a different store, "Can we look at the toy inception?"  (I'm assuming he's attempting to use the word 'section.')

Joshua loves his Wranglers.  Unfortunately, he only has one pair.  I let him wear them for two days before I insist on washing them.  On the third day, he wears his pajamas.  If his Wranglers aren't available, nothing else is good enough.

For the most part, I love Joshua's questions.
The other day:
"What would happen if there was no sky?"
"I don't know Joshua," I replied.  "What do you think?"
"I learned about it in Primary last time, but I don't remember."

I was very impressed with Joshua's wisdom today when he said, "Lots of people call me 'Josh'.  You should have called me 'Josh' when I was a baby and then people would call me 'Joshua' now when I am big."

Lately, Joshua is frequently lamenting the lack of buttons...

While seeing a Walmart toy ad on the computer screen:
"I wish there was a button on the computer and Woody and Buzz toys came out."

While waiting patiently for me to help him with his coat the other day:
"I wish there was a button on my coat and it zipped it up."

While getting tired on a bike ride last week:
"I wish there was a button that made the handles come up high and you didn't have to hold on."

Currently, Joshua loves, loves, loves the Toy Story characters.  As we don't have too much exposure to television/movie characters around here, this is the first time we have had a child so enamored with a 'character.'  (Barney coming to Megan's 2nd birthday party was mostly my love affair with Barney, not hers...)  

Joshua's love affair began back in the fall with the neighbor's Woody Doll.  Of course there is no doubt it was Woody's cowboy persona that drew Joshua in.  Between Santa's delivery of a couple of Woody dolls, a purchase last month made in a weak parenting moment of a very overpriced Toy Story set, and a bargain Toy Story 3 DVD, Joshua LOVES Toy Story 3, specifically, Woody and Jesse.

The over-priced, but under-quality Jessie doll from the set has already had one visit to Daddy's Super Glue Hospital to have her broken head fixed, and is now currently laying on Daddy's bedside table awaiting her broken leg to be fixed.  Joshua recently dubbed Jessie as his 'ger-friend'.

And though there was a very brief moment today that I wondered what it was exactly that I love about Joshua, I couldn't help but recall earlier in the day, while helping Joshua with the button on his Wranglers he said, "You are the best Mom in the whole big world."

Honest Love

I have spent LOTS of time with my husband over the past (almost) two weeks.  And though of course I TRULY love him, man alive am I exhausted from playing nurse.  Nonetheless, here are a few thoughts for my Valentine...

(And to clarify now, so some of these make sense later... Mike had major back surgery.  In order to allow the bone grafts (made up of some of his hip bone, cadaver bone and discs ) to fuse properly he can not bend, lift or twist, or walk/be up for longer than five minutes 4-5 times a day.)

I LOVE that I have assisted with very little homework and signed very few school papers the past week.  That is now Mike's job.  I'm quite giddy with the extra time to myself come mid-afternoon.  Ok, that is a slight exaggeration, there is no extra time to myself come mid-afternoon, but I do like that homework is temporarily not part of my mid-afternoon routine.

I love the little things I have learned from my husband....Like he has to have between his toes dried when he gets out of the shower.  Who dries between their toes??  I never have, but I lovingly do for him what he can't do for himself.  I bend down and dry in between EACH of his toes.  (Actually,  it isn't always lovingly, after all, it isn't as though I have nothing better to do!)

The past couple of weeks since Mike's surgery have shown me even more than I already knew, how much Mike really, really does for our house, family, kids, etc.  I miss his efforts.  But last night, I loved his efforts.... I went to bed with a migraine and was pretty dead to the world before 9pm.  I did not hear Joshua wake up crying in the night--I didn't wake up until Mike came back to the bedroom and was attempting to change his underwear....  Mike then informed me that Joshua had just peeed on him while Mike was comforting/holding him on his bed.  Mike declined my offer to let me help him get dressed, and instead politely used the 'get dressed tools' from the hospital, and let me fall back asleep.

Having Mike home all day every day for going on ten days now, I am realizing just how much I talk to myself!   The first few days were spent with Mike asking, "What did you say?" or "I can't hear you."  After repeatedly having to admit, "I'm talking to myself,"  instead of calling me crazy, Mike kindly said, "You talk to yourself a lot."

During Mike's allotted exercise time.  I love that he invites Drew to walk with him as he laps the downstairs and thus keeps Drew occupied and out of mischief for five minutes...

(Yes, I am well aware that those are some pretty ugly 'Mountain Dew' pajama pants he's wearing...)

I love that a lot of my housework is falling by the wayside.  I really do.  After Mike quit the pain meds after the fourth day home, he is awake, alert, coherent and thus... getting a little stir-crazy.  I spend too many lazy minutes simply laying by Mike's side in bed, or in the chair next to the bed chatting.  A (hopefully) once in a lifetime opportunity, we really don't want to let pass us by.

And if you can believe this, when I am finished going to the bathroom, I put the toilet seat up, so he doesn't have to bend at all to put the seat up when he needs to go.  Ahh-nothing like true love.

Happy Heart Day All!

PS-If you're interested in what my mother thinks of Mike despite being mooned by him once (or twice), you can read about it here.

Freezing The Toddler

A couple of weeks ago, Drew grew out of his first real pair of shoes.  A little size 5 pair of tan tennis shoes he has had since August.  I didn't quite know what to do with them.  Sentimentality prevented me from putting them in the Deseret Industries (local charity) pile, yet reason prevented me from putting them in my cedar chest (with too many other outgrown clothes I just can't seem to part with for one reason or another...)  Instead the little outgrown shoes sat on a bench in the garage awaiting their fate.

On a recent Saturday afternoon, I passed the little brown tennis shoes as I made my way to the car with a bag of things for the DI.  As I loaded the bag into the back of the car, I pondered out loud, "Should I keep Drew's old shoes or not?"  Mike from the driver's seat loudly stated a bold, "NO" before I was even finished with the question.  As Megan turned around to look at me, she said wisely, "Think about some little boy wearing them who might really need them."

And so tossing aside all my DI opinions (I really should air those one day...), I grabbed the nearby shoes that have carried Drew's little feet for months and tossed them into the back of the suburban.  Realizing there are plenty of memories I can keep that don't collect dust, or take up room in the already-hard-to-close cedar chest.

This afternoon, I watched Drew snuggle up with Mike and I verbalized out loud the stark realization, "My baby is almost TWO! TWO YEARS OLD!"  Mike absolutely loves the 2-4 age range, and so he answered, "Can't wait!"
It left me with mixed feelings.

Though I love the ease in which day to day life carries on without a little baby around,  I certainly have mixed feelings with each passing day, as my life gets further away from the baby stage.

My baby is almost TWO!
Where has/is the time going?
Freeze time freeze!

Clearing My Mind

Street Corners-It is that dreaded time of year again.  When a busy intersection seems to warrant fools dressed as the Statue of Liberty or Uncle Sam trying to appeal to me to give them my tax business.  And two years later, I still have the same thoughts.  I feel like I will lose the blood flow in my  hands from gripping the steering wheel so tightly to refrain from doing something with my hands that I never do, yet every year these people bring out that desire in me.  I don't know what causes it.  But it clearly, irritates me. Really, does a person dressed up as Uncle Sam or The Statue of Liberty really attract business?


Flowers--Last Tuesday morning, before Mike was due at the hospital for his surgery, he ran over to our friend's house to see if Kari was home.  She wasn't and he seemed kind of bummed.  As 'luck' would have it, we had to turn around after a few blocks because we had forgotten something and as we pulled into our cul-de-sac, Kari was pulling into her driveway.  While I ran and retrieved the forgotten item, he spoke with Kari.  I quizzed him about the conversation, and then I completely forgot it...  Until, Friday afternoon, when Kari and Kellen brought us dinner.  Kari walked in carrying a beautiful vase of flowers and announced, "They are from Mike."  How thoughtful is that!?  Guess he remembered the long summer I spent taking care of him and his broken foot...  How can I get too irritated at his helplessness when every time I enter the kitchen I see the beautiful bouquet on my table?  I heart my husband!

(Answer to this question, How can I get too irritated at his helplessness when every time I enter the kitchen I see the beautiful bouquet on my table? Even with the beautiful flowers sitting on the table, After getting Mike his 57th drink of the day, or giving the 78th dose of medicine or helping him dress/undress for the 43rd time, it is very easy to say, "In a few weeks, you're going to owe me BIG TIME!")

Sweats-Remember my 'Fashion Loser' post a couple of years ago?  Well ever since having Drew, I reduced my wearing of sweats to only once a week.  And if you can believe it, I sometimes even skip that small allowance!  Well. Somehow after spending last week sitting in a hospital room, and then the last few days staying close to home, playing nurse, my love of sweats has been reignited.   Yesterday? The day I did actually get 'dressed up?'  I had my sweats back on by 4:15pm.  It is evenings like that, that I miss my summer house-dress.  Do they make more winter-like house-dresses...

Temples--Within the LDS church, temples are very important buildings to us.  As LDS people, we believe that they are the Lord's house and what happens inside of the temples is of an eternal nature and binds families together FOREVER.  There are LDS members throughout the world that live very far distances from temples, and make grand sacrifices to attend even once.  Here in Utah, we are blessed to have many within a close proximity to our house.  Joshua has a little board book about Temples.  It is one of his favorites to have read to him, one of the pages reads, "Is there a temple near you?"  Each time I read that line he says, "No."  Though, from Joshua's bedroom window, we can see the temple that is less than ten miles away, to Joshua "It is not by our house, it is by Jonah's house." (his friend)  It makes me want to laugh and cry all at the same time.  Laugh because of his innocence and cry because he has no idea how truly blessed he is.

HOMEMADE Rice Krispie Treats-I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE them.  Like I can eat a whole pan of them LOVE.  In fact, next time somebody says, "What can I do to help you?"  I'm going to tell them to bring ME some Rice Krispie Treats!!  Pure solace for the soul.

People-For the past six weeks or so, it seems I am very easily irritated with mild infractions of behaviors and/or personalities.  It seems for a while now everything and everyone has been making me crazy.  (Of course, I'm not referring to you.) I have felt the need to show greater kindness and compassion to the acquaintances, strangers, neighbors, and people around me.  And though I have felt the need, doesn't mean I have actually done it.  Recently, while driving with Mike I innocently mentioned that it had been a while since we had seen some particular friends.  His response, "It probably has something to do with their membership?"  "What are you talking about?!" I immediately demanded.  His reply: "Their membership in the human race.  Doesn't it seem you have a problem with nearly every member of the human race lately?"  I think I was speechless.  And that doesn't happen very often at all.

I'm working on it.

The End.

Capturing The Moment

"I'm going to keep this forever and ever." exclaimed Joshua recently while holding a newly found stick along the walking trail.  And of course I knew he wouldn't.  I knew within a few hours the stick would be long gone.  And not just the stick, probably to Joshua, the thought of it too.

The innocence in Joshua's voice and the excitement in his eyes as he passionately exclaimed, "I'm going to keep this forever and ever" was enough to make me tear up. I wanted a still picture of the moment. I wanted a video of the moment. And I wanted an eloquently worded essay about the moment.
But I knew I would have none.
Instead, I just enjoyed the moment and continued on the walk.

Though I have always been an avid journal writer, frequent blogger and camera grabber, I am beginning to realize that there are SO MANY moments that I commit to want to 'keep forever and ever' yet it is next to impossible to do.

I can't capture everything!

(Yes. That is a booger stuck on Joshua's teeth!)

As I mentioned before, last week my computer crashed.  Everything was gone.  Fortunately, I still have everything up until December 2010.   But as for 2010...what photos or writings weren't put on my blog or Power of Moms, I have lost.  (I know, I know-I will now join the technological world and BACK THINGS UP.)  (Thank heavens for my blog!)

(Yes. Drew may still have a bottle when he is in Kindergarten. Oh well.)

And so I go back to Joshua and the stick that he was going to 'keep forever and ever.'  He didn't.  I'm not sure it even made it home from the walk.  But the lesson Joshua taught me has stayed with me.  As much as I  want to remember everything.
I won't.
And that is ok.
I am trying to live in the moment more.
I can't capture EVERYTHING.
Sometimes I just have to enjoy it.

It's All Relative

The other morning I was a little overwhelmed and shedding a few tears about feeling like I have to be here, there and everywhere all at the same time.  While crying and talking with a dear friend, I said, "I have no business crying, things could be so much worse."  My wise, wise friend said, "Things can always be worse.  And just because you know that, does not diminish something being hard for you right now."

It made me feel lots better.

Still, I really have no room to complain, when I have three close friends whose husbands are in far worse physical health situations.  We have been blessed with great friends, great family and loving phone calls, texts and thoughts of love and prayers.   Mike has a long road ahead still following such a major surgery, but we'll just take it one day at a time.

And...if
He can keep his oxygen levels up on his own today, and quit throwing up from pain meds, he may just be able to come home today!  It's been a looonnnggg week.
Fingers crossed...
xx

Winter Blues?

If you've got a little of the Winter blues and need a reason to smile...

When I returned home at 9:15am from working my shift at the temple last Saturday morning, this is what I saw:

(Luke. Saturday morning, just having finished his toast while watching a video with Megan on the computer.)