Thursday, June 28, 2012

I Just Said What?

This evening as we were getting ready to eat dinner outside on the patio, I yelled to Luke, "Please get Cousin Ricky's skull off of the picnic table." As soon as the words came out, I couldn't help but ask myself if I had really just said that.

Indeed I had.

I was referring to one of the 6 cow skulls Luke was gifted by our bishop (leader of our local church congregation) last Sunday that was subsequently being stored on our outdoor picnic area.

I know, I know. Bishops are supposed to give counsel, advice, and spiritual guidance, not cow skulls. But bishop's giving away cow skulls is not my point.

My point?
There are so many things I say to my children that I never could have imagined ever saying. I'm sure that in 13 years of motherhood, I could come up with a pretty exhaustive list, but it's late and so in addition to the aforementioned "Please remove the skull" comment, here are a few things I can't believe I have had to say.

  • While sitting in a church meeting, saying to a child of mine, "No! You can NOT take off your clothes."
  • "No, I won't hold the chicken for you."
  • "Please get your underwear off of your head."
  • "We don't melt crayons in the car."
  • "Please hold onto *it* while you are pee-ing."
  • "Yes, you can have ice cream for breakfast."
  • "Just shove it under your bed for now."
  • "We don't store boogers on our foreheads."
  • "Who put a cup-full of rocks in the freezer?"
  • "Yes. I'll have the goats to school by 2:30pm."
  • While driving in the car together, hollering to the back-seat, "Does Drew have clothes on?"
  • "Sorry, but we don't take bags of chips into the bathroom with us while we go potty."

And I know as a fact, I could never have imagined this: having photo after photo of a child conducting his own singing with a pencil, wearing just underwear and sunglasses. (Not to mention the fact I have no idea who took the photos!)

Sometimes I feel like motherhood is just one surprise after another.

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