But, alas, I have not yet given it in. I love the ease and speed in which I can record a memory, a moment or a thought.
Blogging is a very interesting phenomenon--and though, I myself read a fair number of blogs, I have a few blogging pet-peeves.
Why do I write? To record my thoughts, feelings and memories, or for others to read, or both!? I would be lying if I didn't say, I love receiving kind thoughts, compliments and comments, but that isn't the reason I write. I don't have a blog to see how many followers or readers I can generate. And though, I do enjoy reading the comments I receive, I do occasionally consider turning off the comment option. Several people frequently Facebook, email or text me comments for them to be more private, I love receiving them all. I write for me, and though I am THRILLED people care to read what I write, I don't write merely for the feedback.
I don't love the anonymity that the world wide web offers. Whether it is blog comments or comments on newspaper articles, news stories, etc. I think anonymity goes hand in hand with cowardness. The things people spout off all in the name of anonymity are hard to take seriously. If you have something to say, you should be able to stand behind it. Otherwise, I think you lose a lot of credibility.
Though blogs, certainly count as a journal, they should by no means take the place of my personal journal. Whether a blog is private or public, there are some things that shouldn't be written for anyone but you to see. Enough said.
There seems to be such a pretense of 'life is all good' that springs forth from many blogs. No one's life is perfect, no one's life is magical, and no one's life is without problems. I don't want to ever paint an inaccurate picture of what my life is like. I do my very best to balance the reality of my life without crossing the line into problems or situations that really don't have a place in such a public forum.
When somebody tells me my life 'seems charmed' or 'I want my family to be like yours when I grow up' I wonder if I am painting an inaccurate portrayal of my life. I slam doors, I throw books and I raise my voice. My toilets have dried pee on them, my floor hasn't been mopped in a few weeks, I could write a love note in the dust on my bedroom dresser and my children have many less than desirable qualities. But then again, I am a realist. I see through most 'life looks perfect' on the outside of others, and assume too often people do the same to me. But too many (women in particular) don't, and it does a disservice to us ALL.
Our life is FAR from perfect. I hope I accurately portray that.
But for now, I'll keep on blogging. I love uploading a picture, typing a few sentences and VOILA- having a record of my people. And having that record, combined with my love of writing, is really why I continue to do this. And if a few people enjoy it along the way, then it's probably worth it!
PS-Just to clarify--On my four recommendations on my 'Record of My People' post, they were recommendations. I did not and have not ever, ever, claimed to have mastered any of them. Therefore there is no hypocrisy involved. Just sayin'!
3 comments:
I totally agree. Which is why, more often than not, I don't end up blogging as much as I would like to. Sometimes I feel like I don't want to add to the millions of "happy-go-lucky molly-mormon" blogs out there, and sometimes I feel like my posts are whiny and pathetic.
Now, if and when I post, I just try to capture an image or brief thought.
I will gladly leave the writing and deep thoughts to you and others who have a genuine talent for writing and expressing your thoughts/feelings in a creative and enjoyable manner.
You just have a way with words my friend :)
Tiffany,
I gather that my latest comments offended you yet again. I know they can be read as intentionally mean-spirited or hurtful. I wish you could understand that they are meant only to provoke (which they have), not hurt or harm. Listen with that big heart of yours which understands the language of sincerity which I am speaking and don’t be too hasty to grab for the tar and feathers or the nails and the crossbeam (pick your metaphor of choice). You will feel that there is no malice or ill will behind my comments whatsoever, just a playful approach with genuine concern.
You are toying with the idea of throwing in the blogging towel which I think would be a huge mistake. I say that not because of any selfish motivations. While it’s true I would miss reading your blog, it is you who will suffer most if you don’t write. You have the ability to help others, and you are doing a fine job. So what if I call you on your hypocrisy now and then. We are all hypocrites several times a day but not enough of us have friends who prove true enough to point it out without taking the backlash personally.
So please keep a stiff upper lip and learn to take the bad with the good. I hope you will keep doing your thing and make an effort to be more raw and real with each post. Block anonymous comments if you feel you must, but you will lose out on precious feedback from your only reader who refuses to blow sunshine up your skirt. I promise to keep things very real and give you the kind of feedback you hate, but can’t afford to go without. I will keep you honest, the way any friend should. You don’t ever have to publish what I say – I don’t care one bit – but I would hope you will still read my comments and not just delete them outright.
I know you loathe me right about now and that is expected. I know you wish you could reach through your computer and punch me in the face like I were one of those clowns wearing a stupid Statue of Liberty costume and dancing on the street corner. I won’t take it personally because I understand who it is you are really most frustrated with. For now, I will be the outlet for your frustration, but given the opportunity, I will ultimately make you face the mirror and see it is only yourself you are mad at. That will be my gift to you if you receive it, a gift that none of your so-called “friends” are capable of giving. They have too much at stake whereas I have nothing to lose. Hence the anonymity. You can call it cowardice if you like, but it affords me the opportunity to help in ways I couldn’t otherwise. When the time is right I will reveal my identity. You can hate me all the more then, but hopefully I will have proven you wrong about my motives by that time, and you will understand that I really did just want to help and forgive me for this role I felt compelled to play.
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