Monday, June 27, 2011

Mind Conflict


This warm summer weather accentuates even more the ever-present conflict I have in my mind. The thoughts of "I can't wait for this stage to end." and "Oh, time is passing too quickly."

Drew wants to be outside morning, day, and night. But there are a few problems with his incessant want.
1. I am limited in what I can really get done outside, and though I am enjoying the laziness of sitting in a chair reading while he plays, there's only so many hours in a day I can realistically neglect inside chores.
2. If by chance he slips through a left-open door, he wants to be on the drive-way riding, pedaling, and pulling, and the risks are too great for him to be left unattended. So in I bring him, and the wails and tears begin.
3. His nice siblings do take turns with him, but when one returns in and I ask, "Where is Drew?" The answer that in essence says, "Being babysat by a four year old" is not acceptable!

Drew makes messes, has temper tantrums, escapes without telling me his whereabouts, can't communicate as well as he (or I) would like, refuses to wear clothes, and most recently left skid-marks of poo, perfectly centered down the flight of stairs, as he slid down on his bum with a (very) poopy diaper! But there is just something about the pitter-patter of little feet on the tile, the sounds of a diaper swooshing between his legs as he runs, and the endearing smiles, hugs, kisses and expressions of a two year old that I will so dearly, dearly miss.

And therein lies the conflict ever in my mind.

My head feels as though these inconveniences will never end.
My heart is starkingly aware they will.

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